In the future we'll all be gay
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
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