We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Randomize