Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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