Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize