Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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