So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
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