What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize