Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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