i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize