May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
When are your genitals available?
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize