Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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