He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
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you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
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Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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