gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
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