I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
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Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
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He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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