Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has the best kind of daddy issues
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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