Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(313): View more from Michigan

You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now

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(313): You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now http://tfl.nu/dcco

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(079): View more from

I think we need to take a brake

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What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'

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(079): I think we need to take a brake (078): What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake' http://tfl.nu/ju32

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(512): View more from Texas

just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.

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(512): just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever. http://tfl.nu/ittj

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(815): View more from Illinois

So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)

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(815): So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:) http://tfl.nu/dc1v

Replies (6) Good night (4760) Bad night (897)
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(619): View more from California

Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.

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(619): Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes. http://tfl.nu/4wgk

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.

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(215): It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis. http://tfl.nu/bygw

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(916): View more from California

You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.

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(916): You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest. http://tfl.nu/46jw

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(612): View more from Minnesota

Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested

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(612): Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested http://tfl.nu/tmq3

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(206): View more from Washington

she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters

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(206): she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters http://tfl.nu/lstj

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(989): View more from Michigan

I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit

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(989): I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit http://tfl.nu/8uwi

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(264): View more from Anguilla

I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.

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(264): I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob. http://tfl.nu/tyhu

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(813): View more from Florida

Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!

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(813): Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed! http://tfl.nu/9riq

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(817): View more from Texas

No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...

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(817): No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex... http://tfl.nu/th3v

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(845): View more from New York

You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"

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(845): You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender" http://tfl.nu/qf49

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(585): View more from New York

I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one

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(585): I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one http://tfl.nu/3p0c

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