Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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