So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
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