pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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