Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
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