WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
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