I can't open my eyes
Lol why not?
Because I have fat ankles and I'm drunk
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
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