So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
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Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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