The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
It was confusing and full of hummus
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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