So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Randomize