I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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