i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
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Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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