YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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