Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Randomize