can u get pink eye on your cock?
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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