got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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