dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
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Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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