I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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