I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
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By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
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Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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