Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
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