hotel room ftw
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Randomize