You just made me feel so damn special
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize