I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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