I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
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