I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
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