You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
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