why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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