Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize