Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize