I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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