im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
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