The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
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