note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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