He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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