Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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